Speaking of Nannies, House-helpers & Why Moms Need Help

Blessing Oshin May 12, 2011 4

When you are a full-time mother, worker, and/or wife, then you are sure stretching yourself every now and then. As a young working mother with only one child, I am still able to juggle work, household duties, my daughter, and life….but I do not expect thesame for a mother of two or more.  I once babysat for a friend who also happens to be a working mother and needed some alone time with her husband, the experience was an eye-opener. I had to keep an eye on both toddlers, prepare dinner, prepare for work the next day, and at thesame time reading stories to the girls. It was the most humbling experience and to think that my mother raised six children *sigh*. Recently, a blogger (Megan Francis), have been reprimanded for offering housekeeping advice but just recently voiced that she indeed hired help twice a month to help deal with the craziness in her life. Megan is a mother of five, and her husband works out of town which means Megan is dealing with five kids on her own during the day. Bear in mind, she also works from home and brings in 50% of the household income.

What is wrong with 6 to 8 hours of cleaning service to help regain one’s sanity? And why can’t she offer cleaning advice if she has the expertise? I don’t suppose her house is in pure chaos for the rest of the 28 days when the cleaning lady is off-duty, bear in mind, five kids! I think that everyone expects that if a woman can work, then she should have the energy to perform all her duties in the home. But of course if this was a man who works day and night and hires a cleaning maid, this won’t be an issues. We are all indeed hypocrites. Any working mother claiming to doing it all is an hypocrite. We all know that we have at some point hired a nanny, a maid, a friend or even family to help cover up for us. I wrote a couple of months ago about doing work that matters and if mopping the floor and cleaning the bathroom is not exactly value-adding, then by all means outsource.

I think that we should hire help whenever we need it. I believe that “doing it all” is a myth. I believe that working mothers should focus on their careers, family and value-added activities if that is what makes them happy. What do you think? Do you have a helper?

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  1. Melanie B. May 14, 2011 at 10:22 pm - Reply

    I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, hiring someone to help clean. I feel like such a failure if I do, but my evenings are for piano, karate, baseball, etc., etc. I also have control/OCD issues and I’m not certain I can let someone else do the cleaning. Yipes. I want to though!!

    • WMJ May 16, 2011 at 5:38 am - Reply

      Deep inside, I want to as well. There is no harm in someone mowing the lawn and doing laundry, scrubbing the bathroom though. Maybe not my kitchen or bedroom, at least once a month if one can afford it. Currently, I cannot….but I am open to this idea in the near future.

  2. The Working Home Keeper May 15, 2011 at 7:24 am - Reply

    I work full-time outside of the home, as does my husband. We also have three kids. It would be nice to have someone come in for mopping the floors and deep cleaning the showers. But my husband doesn’t agree with the added expense. So no paid helpers for us. My mother lives with us and does the laundry (she really enjoys ironing!). My husband helps with some light cleaning, but the rest is on me.

    To each his own. I know SAHMs who have outside help.

    Mary Ellen
    The Working Home Keeper

    • WMJ May 16, 2011 at 5:40 am - Reply

      Thanks Mary for sharing your experience. I also know SAHMs that have helpers, Megan Francis is a typical example…but in her defense, she works from home. My mom is transitioning to coming to live with us. I cannot wait. I do not like the added expenses either, so i’d rather foot my Mom’s bills than give it to a stranger.

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